Halloween 2018

Well Boos and Ghouls, Halloween has come and gone. It always amazes me how I spend the whole month, even year looking forward to it and it's over in a couple hours. I guess that is what Christmas feels like to everyone else.

So to start my day off I wanted to go wash the hearse, but I stopped to air up a tire and get a coffee at the local "Maverick" convenience store.

I came out of the convenience store and a couple young men yelled at me they liked my house, meaning my hearse. So I was a little confused, but said "thanks" anyway... I'm not sure if they thought I just looked homeless or they thought a hearse would make a good home? I decided that they were going with the hearse is a good mobile home and get away car for vampires...

There were some firsts for me, I had to scrub the crappy clay dirt up here from my hearse! It sucked, once I was done I thought I needed a nap! Right in the middle of it all a guy pulls up to wash his car and he asked me about my coach. I showed it all to him and I explained how they were made yackitty smakitty… and then I said something about it being called a "hearse" and he looks at me, straight faced and says, "what is that?" I just held my arms open wide and gestured to my hearse.

This was also my first "Trunk-or-Treat," something of a necessity since I have moved from the city to the rural county side. This enables kids that live outside of the city limits, on farms or ranches to all gather someplace and get candy. It's kind of like in valley were you just bus the kids into the most affluent neighborhoods to get candy.

I pulled up and a young man said for me to park next to a fire pick-up truck (so not the big fire truck but a pick-up truck) which I did. Then I set about putting spider web on my coach and just decorating for the evening. From behind me I hear some woman say, "I'm sorry but that is just creepy." I just said something over my shoulder like, "isn't that the point?" as I continued to decorate. Then I put my church truck out and pulled my casket part way out of the back and perched it up on the church truck.

The Trunk-or-Treat is extremely fast paced, seriously, there is no break, I threw candy in bags for a good two hours non-stop. In the neighborhood Trick-or-Treat, you got a break after one mob of kids would show up then you could go to the bathroom, do a shot or re-supply candy. The nice thing is I didn't have to spend $100 on candy this year. I bought the biggest bag I could find for $10 and that's all I had to get. The Trunk-or-Treat supplies the candy!

Now as to the best costume, for me it was a kid that dressed up as a faun from the Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. The kid made their whole costume from armor to cloven hooves! There was a girl, I'm not sure what she was supposed to be but she made a wide toothy grinning mouth using hot glue and fake stiletto nails. She affixed her home made prosthetic to her face and then covered it with a hospital mask. When she got up to me, with a great flourish she pulled her hospital mask off one ear to reveal her grotesque maw. I thought her prosthetic was well done. There was also a cute little robot costume made out of cardboard and one family showed up in those inflatable t-rex costumes!

One kid showed up in a Santa costume, and I tried to spread the good word of Krampus. He just looked at me funny, I told him to look it up when he got home.

I thought it was interesting that people kept asking me if I was from the Silver Creek or Owens Livingston Funeral homes (I'm shocked there are two of them up here). I tried to make it clear that this was my own personal vehicle and not one of the funeral homes. I know that sometimes funeral directors don't like people that aren't in the bizz to drive coaches around, and especially not ones with caskets in them.

I suppose I should mention my costume... I really wasn't sure what I had to wear, but luckily crap that I took to HearseCon included my skeleton poncho, then I had the hat my friend Tina made me and gave to me at HearseCon and I bought a skeleton half mask off Amazon. Not my best costume, but I thought it was pretty cool considering most of my stuff is in storage a the moment. Sorry no pictures I was just to tired and it would have been a selfie. Harvey was my co-pilot and he finds phones difficult to use because he's just cold and boney.

All in all it was a good time and I look forward to doing it again next year.

Halloween 2014 - the year of the Hearse

On October 30^th I lay awake trying to sort out in my mind what I was going to do for Halloween. I am so excited I can't sleep anyway. I had the ultimate Halloween prop, the hearse, this was our first year together.

I decided on a couple of different plans, I had hoped that I would be able to fold myself up at the bottom of the casket, hopefully being completely hidden by the second lid. I could also hide in the back of the hearse and come exploding out… or I could crouch down at the front of the car and run to the back when there were Trick or Treaters.

Finally morning came and then , I kept saying to hubby, "Hey, hey, guess what?" He would dutifully say, "what?"and then I would say, "TODAY IS HALLOWEEN." He would then say, "yes dear, you've told me 500 times today." Then I had to wait ALL DAY for it finally to be the “witching hour” when the Trick or Treaters would arrive. Seriously I think I am more excited than the kids.

I parked the hearse catty corner in the drive way so Trick or Treaters could see the side of the car. I put the purple lights in around the top and on the door. Harvey and Mildred my skeletons were in attendance. Harvey was sitting in one of the camp chairs, and Mildred was sitting in the back of the hearse as she often does at the car shows.

Malice placed many of her Living Dead Dolls on the table. We couldn’t find the usually candy bowl/cauldron this year, so I cleaned out all my sewing projects from the one cauldron and it was filled with candy. We had three 245, piece bags, and we went to the store for more that morning, by the end of the night we were OUT!

Next it was time to pull the casket out of the hearse and put it on the ground behind it. In pulling the casket out of the hearse and opening it fully we discovered that someone had already lain in the casket (with dirty shoes) and that the hinge for the bottom lid was busted, and someone had used a cotter pin to secure it to the top.

So with the crumby hinges, I wasn’t going to be able to swiftly open the lid at the appointed time to scare the kiddies. So begrudgingly I agreed to just lie in the casket and when Malice uttered the words, “don’t be afraid of the skeleton” I would pop up and reach out. I thought this was never going to work, I’d be instantly be made by anyone.

I laid down as the first group came, as I suspected no one was scared. I could also hear myself breathing in my mask, it was so loud! I don’t know how anyone else couldn't hear it! The next group came and lo, I did scar some, one poor little, little kid that was dressed like a foot ball player.

As the night wore on I hit some and some made me as soon as they walked up. I learned a couple new things… When you make yourself into a prop you don’t get to eat candy and drink booze while ooing and ahing over the Trick or Treaters costumes. I also learned that some parents are mean! So often they would tell their kids to come over and look at me and I would pop up and scare them!

Some neighbors that had been driving by wanted to come over and see the set up, they made me as soon as they walked up. We offered them shots and they stood around talking to Malice and Dragon. I was sitting up as well getting a drink. I had my mask up, I saw some kids coming so I lay down, assuming that they saw me.

So I lay still and hear people around me, and then a little boy says, “hi, skeleton.” I assume I’ve been made so I sit up and reach out for the boy, I think I even brushed him. He took off running and made it passed the neighbors house to the stop sign before his parents were able to yell for him to stop! Of course we are all evil and started laughing.

About 8:10pm a couple older kids came by, and they made me of course. They were given a couple big hand full’s of candy. They then said they had to put on a show, so the proceeded to do a choreographed sword fight! They were pretty good!

Malice’s kids were over and her grandson and son in law assisted me with a good scare. They poked me and said that nothing would happen. Then when I heard someone close I sat up, scared a couple.

It was a fun night, and now I feel like one does after opening all their Christmas presents… 365 more days to go until I get to do this again! Ugh... Oh well on to Krampusnacht...