I always want to do a review of my year, but I always kind of feel it's 11 months of boring with a month of excitement.
Not this year, this year was HARD for me.
Technically starting in 2017... I was texted that my horse was bleeding on 12/29/17. I had my room-mate drive me to the stable because I was to sick to drive myself. The poor horse's chest was all swollen up, raw and bleeding. I called the vet out and that lead to six months of treating my horse for some unknown infection and scary diagnoses, which in the end turned out to be a summer sore and allergies.
While that was going on Tigger my cat, my best bud, developed a tumor in his nose. Unfortunately there was nothing we could do and I had to put him to sleep. I was terrified that Finn, the horse would suffer the same fate.
I had to ask my work if I could work from home or quit my job and start a wonderful career with Pizza Hut. I am extremely lucky they said yes, I could work from home!
Next was time to pack up the house. I didn't think the Waffle would have sold it so fast. Then it was a mad dash to sort, get rid of and pack up over 20 years worth of stuff. I hate moving, I just sort of get lost in the minutia of it all. So it was very slow and arduous for me. I am thankful for my room mate that did most of the packing.
Then it was time for HearseCon, which I almost backed out of 100 times. I had agreed to split my room cost with my friends. I just couldn't do that to them, so in spite of having to move at the same time I decided to make the drive to Denver. I think it was a much needed vacation. It was one of the best times I have had at HearseCon.
I returned to a much different home 174 miles away from my previous one. My 1500 square foot home on 1.5 acres has been downsized to a 5th wheel trailer on 40 acres. I live in the middle of nowhere and now we work to finish the house we've been building for about 3 years. It's all terrifying and wonderful at the same time.
So for 2019, we hope to finish the house and I am excited to achieve one of my life long dreams, going to Wacken Open Air in Germany!
Sunday, December 30, 2018
Friday, December 21, 2018
The saga of Sparkle Farts...
It's Christmas and in my family that means a secret Santa gift exchange. We draw names at Thanksgiving and when we are all together at Christmas, we of course do the deed, and exchange the gifts.
So, adult and child names are just thrown into a hat and drawn. This year my Waffle (a.k.a. Husband) drew his niece of course the gift shopping/purchase was then pushed off onto me. Now our niece is all of seven years old and one of the items she really, really wanted was a, Baby Alive.
You can guess by the name that the "Baby Alive" does all the things that a really baby does, such as eat, drink, cry, talk and yes, the resulting bodily functions. Now as a woman who doesn't have children but does have animals, I really don't see the point in having a doll that does that. Ya wanta feed and clean up after something? I have a horse and four cats, my niece is more than welcome to feed and clean up after. My niece herself has a dog and rabbit (which she doesn't clean up after).
...but a Baby Alive is what she wants, and Uncle Waffle drew her and I am certain that he wouldn't get her the doll. So we were talking about what to get her and some how the Squatty Potty came up and the unicorn in the ads would be perfect.
Through a quick internet search we discovered that there was a unicorn doll that eats and well, you know. This was called, "Poopsie Slime Surprise Unicorn-Rainbow Bright Star." It's droppings consisted of a sort of sparkly gelatin substance. I was laughing and said that if my horse had "Poopsie slime surprise" I'd need to call the vet!
I went to Amazon and added "Poopsie Slime Surprise Unicorn-Rainbow Bright Star" to my wish list.
As I was actually cleaning up my horses not so sparkly surprise... The thought that, I'm sure my mother-in-law wouldn't want to have to fuss with mixing up slime and sparkles so that my niece could feed the unicorn. If only there was a gift that didn't require such maintenance, but was along the same lines...
Amazon recommendations to the rescue, enter Sparkle Farts!
Sparkle Farts is a unicorn plushie that, you guessed it, farts. His story is that he got into the Royal Taco Patch, which apparently gives unicorns terrible gas! Not only does he fart, he also talks with a slight British accent! THIS sounded like the perfect gift from Uncle Waffle!
So I ordered the flatulent Equine from Amazon, and gleefully awaited his arrival.
My mother-in-law asked the Waffle what he got for his niece... He told her about Sparkle Farts.
Now... I wasn't there, but apparently this was quite the unacceptable gift to get our niece! I am really at a loss as to how a doll that you have to fuss with and feed and change is superior to a taco eating unicorn that has gas. Ya don't have to feed him, he takes care of that for himself.
Somehow I have become the proud owner of an Equus monoclonius, that has a taste for tacos and is jet propelled on Tuesdays.
And my niece? She got knitting looms with lots of yarn, personally selected by Uncle Waffle.
So, adult and child names are just thrown into a hat and drawn. This year my Waffle (a.k.a. Husband) drew his niece of course the gift shopping/purchase was then pushed off onto me. Now our niece is all of seven years old and one of the items she really, really wanted was a, Baby Alive.
You can guess by the name that the "Baby Alive" does all the things that a really baby does, such as eat, drink, cry, talk and yes, the resulting bodily functions. Now as a woman who doesn't have children but does have animals, I really don't see the point in having a doll that does that. Ya wanta feed and clean up after something? I have a horse and four cats, my niece is more than welcome to feed and clean up after. My niece herself has a dog and rabbit (which she doesn't clean up after).
...but a Baby Alive is what she wants, and Uncle Waffle drew her and I am certain that he wouldn't get her the doll. So we were talking about what to get her and some how the Squatty Potty came up and the unicorn in the ads would be perfect.
Through a quick internet search we discovered that there was a unicorn doll that eats and well, you know. This was called, "Poopsie Slime Surprise Unicorn-Rainbow Bright Star." It's droppings consisted of a sort of sparkly gelatin substance. I was laughing and said that if my horse had "Poopsie slime surprise" I'd need to call the vet!
I went to Amazon and added "Poopsie Slime Surprise Unicorn-Rainbow Bright Star" to my wish list.
As I was actually cleaning up my horses not so sparkly surprise... The thought that, I'm sure my mother-in-law wouldn't want to have to fuss with mixing up slime and sparkles so that my niece could feed the unicorn. If only there was a gift that didn't require such maintenance, but was along the same lines...
Amazon recommendations to the rescue, enter Sparkle Farts!
Sparkle Farts is a unicorn plushie that, you guessed it, farts. His story is that he got into the Royal Taco Patch, which apparently gives unicorns terrible gas! Not only does he fart, he also talks with a slight British accent! THIS sounded like the perfect gift from Uncle Waffle!
So I ordered the flatulent Equine from Amazon, and gleefully awaited his arrival.
My mother-in-law asked the Waffle what he got for his niece... He told her about Sparkle Farts.
Now... I wasn't there, but apparently this was quite the unacceptable gift to get our niece! I am really at a loss as to how a doll that you have to fuss with and feed and change is superior to a taco eating unicorn that has gas. Ya don't have to feed him, he takes care of that for himself.
Somehow I have become the proud owner of an Equus monoclonius, that has a taste for tacos and is jet propelled on Tuesdays.
And my niece? She got knitting looms with lots of yarn, personally selected by Uncle Waffle.
Thursday, December 20, 2018
Watch dog horf*
I'm sure folks know by now that I have a BLM Mustang horse. I always say of her she is vigilant, this makes her a great watch dog, trouble is she can't bark.
I work from home and I have to be at work pretty early in the morning, somewhere around 7:30am-8:30am I hear this sound that, to me, sounds like someone trying to fire up the generator. I didn't think to much of it, I thought it was my father-in-law attempting to fire up the gene because they were out of power.
My husband wakes up and hears this sound and asks what it is, I tell him what I think it is and he says it doesn't sound right to be a gene. He goes out to start his day and I don't think to much about it. Not sure how much later, he comes in and he says, "you know what that sound is?!" I of course said I didn't know. He says, "it's your horf*," snorting because the neighbor's horses and goats are out!
I go outside, and sure enough, she's snorting and carrying on because the horses and goats are by our pump house, 300ft roughly. As we look at the neighbor's horses, we notice one has a halter and lead rope on. So waffle (aka the husband) says we should catch that horse and starts walking over. I told him that he can't go straight at them he kinda has to meander around like he lost his car keys and he's looking for them. He doesn't listen to me and starts walking over, and the horses take one look and trot back home.
Our neighbors came back and put their horses here they belong.
*Waffle adopted the use of "horf" when he thinks the horse is doing something stupid after Tango, touted to be "the stupidest horse ever" on Twitter.
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I work from home and I have to be at work pretty early in the morning, somewhere around 7:30am-8:30am I hear this sound that, to me, sounds like someone trying to fire up the generator. I didn't think to much of it, I thought it was my father-in-law attempting to fire up the gene because they were out of power.
My husband wakes up and hears this sound and asks what it is, I tell him what I think it is and he says it doesn't sound right to be a gene. He goes out to start his day and I don't think to much about it. Not sure how much later, he comes in and he says, "you know what that sound is?!" I of course said I didn't know. He says, "it's your horf*," snorting because the neighbor's horses and goats are out!
I go outside, and sure enough, she's snorting and carrying on because the horses and goats are by our pump house, 300ft roughly. As we look at the neighbor's horses, we notice one has a halter and lead rope on. So waffle (aka the husband) says we should catch that horse and starts walking over. I told him that he can't go straight at them he kinda has to meander around like he lost his car keys and he's looking for them. He doesn't listen to me and starts walking over, and the horses take one look and trot back home.
Our neighbors came back and put their horses here they belong.
*Waffle adopted the use of "horf" when he thinks the horse is doing something stupid after Tango, touted to be "the stupidest horse ever" on Twitter.
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